Did you ever have a Sweet Sixteen “Coming Out” Party? I never did.
Both my daughters were Bas Mitzvah’d — which entailed huge parties for families and friends. In the Jewish tradition, the event signifies the transition of a child becoming an adult at age thirteen. I remember also attending a Christian friend’s Sweet Sixteen party for their daughter. The family made a similarly mammoth gathering, presenting a pair of high heels ceremoniously to their daughter who had now become a full-fledged woman upon reaching the age of sixteen.
So why would I be viewing this year of 2016 at the ripe old age of . . . let’s say at least over-40 . . . as my own “coming out” party?
Because I feel on the brink of something new. I just do.
I have no idea what that “new” will be, but I can feel the energy around me is making way for the opportunity — the “new” whatever — that will soon come knocking. Why should this year be different from all other years? Because of the work I’ve done to prepare.
I actually started all this back in 2014 when my goal was to get my website up. It took a year, but it’s up and I am so proud and grateful to honor my past successes, but to focus on my present with this incredible tool. Next step? How do I continue working my craft without paying for constant classes? I joined a fledgling theater company, Articulate Theatre Company. It’s now 2016 and the year has been devoted to working with new playwrights and keeping the conversation going in social media on “faith” that something would change.
There’s a wonderful Life Coach who just happens to live in my NYC apartment building, Susie Moore. She recently posted a blog about her “secret” to staying on track. I can’t help but hear Ben Vereen’s voice in my own ear as he sings “You’re on . . . the right track . . . you’re on . . .” to Pippin, who has tried any number of ways to gain “fulfillment” in his own life. At the final curtain, when “Catherine” asked “Pippin” how he felt about accepting her and a mundane family life over all the tinsel, glamour and magic . . . he responded . . . “trapped.”
That line was cut in the recent revival. As with Sondheim’s “Company,” marriage can be seen in many different ways depending on your POV.
Now, Pippin was young. I’m not so young (except in spirit). You might not be so young either (hopefully, still in spirit). But, don’t you feel stronger having weathered the challenges of parenthood — together? But now — that family no longer needs you the same way. Well I say, let’s have a Coming Out Party together! Let’s renew the magic in all our lives.
Note Susie’s 5 steps to Staying on Track:
- Clarify your desires;
- Cultivate an “attitude of gratitude”
- Focus on the good
- Visualize your dreams
- Get busy!
Since leaving the law firm, I’ve taken advantage of the “experts” I found online to re-establish myself (and my husband) in the arts: Life coach experts like Susie; Acting Coach experts like Amy Jo Berman, former casting director at HBO; and Marketing & Public Relations coaches like Dallas Travers — all for free. My Fordham Communications degree helped my own credentials when SAG-AFTRA asked me to create a class for all those actors who are still phobic about the lack of privacy on social media. My “Business of the Buzz” class has just heightened my own awareness that we are merely a product and this is a business — that took some adjustment for me especially during those all those years on Guiding Light. I had no idea how the “corporate” head worked! And how cold that corporate giant could be when $$ is their bottom line and the pawn who is the actor is no longer needed. That hurts the soul. Well, not all souls, but I was new to the game. Yes. It hurt big time.
But I truly expected to keep working — somewhere. However, reality check #1, my resume read “gypsy” and “soap opera pretty face.” My power agent drops me and I’m released from more than just “Katie’s” world. I did a lot of soul-searching — desperately wanting to stay tuned into my own sense of truth. Family is Priority #1. Make $$. Get a job/job. Now, 35 years later, why am I seeking to continue pursuing a profession in the arts — at this “you’re dead why don’t you know it” age?
I believe it’s the community. I believe being connected as part of the family created in theater or a long-running anything is still gold. Leaving an impression behind that people 35 years later still remember? That’s gold. Guiding Light was gold. Broadway dancing was gold. Whatever magic still lies ahead for me, I hope to find more gold in them thar hills.
So, yeah — in some ways, I’ve already “come out” through social media by trusting and allowing myself to “sing.” I no longer feel like a caged bird. I’m expecting to celebrate my “coming of age” with a party real soon. Put the theatrical magic back in both our lives to remind the world that married couple on the line in A Chorus Line — are still kicking!
Meanwhile, trying to “strategize,” as Amy Jo Berman and Susie and Dallas Travers — and I — teach “out there” in the wonderful world of free internet advice. See Dallas’ blog on the subject HERE.
Today, I pray for world peace and trust that Hillary in the White House will lead us down the right path for a renewed economy at home and strengthened foreign policy abroad. I believe in her. I believe her choices since Day 1 in law school, were to fight for the underdog; the women and children who can’t fight for themselves. Next week, we’ll see what America believes to be true.
TOGETHER WE’RE STRONGER!
(family motto long before Hillary coined the phrase)
Kitchen Collage made from over 30 years of theater in New York, 2016